Is your love already bankrupt?

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If your relationship with your lover or spouse ended tomorrow (for whatever reason), would you be happy and rejoice in what you had created together?

I don’t mean to imply that you wouldn’t experience a feeling of loss; that feeling of loss could actually be an expression of how special that person has been for you.

 

 

Do you keep racking up the balance on what they "owe" you in the future?

If you are staying in your relationship only because it might get better, then your relationship is already shipwrecked on the shoals of the future.

 

One time I was coaching a woman who'd essentially been unhappy in her marriage for 20 years. I asked, "Why don't you get divorced?" She replied with, "Oh, I can't do that. All the effort I've made in trying to get him to change will have been wasted."

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A simple test for bankruptcy

 

If you cannot turn to your lover or spouse today and truthfully say, “It has been such a privilege and a joy to have you in my life. Even if, for some reason, our relationship ends tomorrow, I am so thankful for all I have shared with you. You have been and are such a blessing in my life,” then you are already in a bankrupt relationship.
 

I am not recommending that you actually say this; without the proper context, it could be taken to mean something different than the intended meaning here.